I have a million things I need to be doing right now other than typing a blog post - but I just did something so profound and had to write about it.
When we picked Lori up from her orphanage, she came with a few personal belongings. Most of the items were things we had sent over to her - toys, clothing, pictures. They also packed her toothbrush, an unopened travel size tube of toothpaste, a lidless sippee cup.......and a bag. I just unzipped the bag.
It contained 4 things plus a plethora of unknowns. I had unzipped this bag twice before - but never really thought about the contents. The first time was in the foyer of the orphanage and the Director quickly explained the contents. The second time was during our presentation at church.
Tonight was different.
After bathing Lori, brushing her teeth, making faces in the bathroom mirror, and putting on her PJs - I headed downstairs to do some quick laundry. In a house of 8 people - the laundry is NEVER caught up. It gets better some days - but its never ending. We can actually see the laundry room floor today - so its on the upswing. While the piles are small, I thought it would be a good time to wash the contents of the bag - which has been sitting over on side of the laundry room for weeks, patiently waiting its turn. I unzipped the bag and did a thorough search. I found 1 small baby undershirt - sort of a faded teal color with little pictures on it. A soft cotton - with little cuffs on the sleeves that can be turned into mittens to keep a baby from scratching itself. I found a puffy pink jacket - way too big for an infant - but perfectly good at keeping a baby warm and cuddled. I found a handmade dark blue striped baby quilt with hand stitching in a coarse with embroidery-type thread. It isn't a work of art by any means. Maybe it was made quickly out of whatever materials the maker had on hand - or maybe the maker spent hours meticulously fashioning this beautiful quilt with the best sewing skills they could muster. And I found a store bought bright orange and while polka dot baby bunting quilt - unlike anything I've seen in the US. Sewn into the top is a little collar that ties around the baby's neck and forms a hood of sorts. It's almost like a small sleeping bag that can worn on the mother's back or maybe it's made to fit a small cradle and surround the baby in softness and warmth.
This is what Lori's parents left her in...............................How profound that here I stand putting it in my washing machine. I stopped and prayed that the Lord would help me understand the depth of this moment. I prayed that her parents would have some peace. I want them to find closure. To "know" that she's ok. She's OK! If I scream this loud enough - do you think they can hear me?
Someone carried this sweet girl in their womb, brought her forth through pain and suffering, and then wrapped her up all warm and snuggly and found the perfect place to put her so that she would quickly be found by well-trained teachers. This was their adoption plan. They loved her enough to seek the best plans for her. And now here I stand on the other side of the world stuffing their baby's quilts in my washing machine and making faces with this little girl in my bathroom mirror. This may be the most profound thing I've ever done.